We experienced friend’s kindness when they gifted us two plants one after the other. One flourished the other didn’t. I used to wonder what led to this unusual difference. We had gifted the first plant to our neighbors and it is still with them and we could see it everyday. The second one is with us. Both the plants were given to us at similar growth stage. One flourished one didn’t – it set me thinking.
I have seen similar patterns in people – some flourishing with time and some deteriorating.
One of the directive given to us by the friends who gifted us the plant was that you must often prune the plant. We hadn’t done much of that in case of the first plant. Also when we gifted the plant to our neighbors we didn’t inform them of this. However, when it came to the second plant we didn’t do it initially but once the plant went through a tough season when it almost seemed dead we did some pruning and it seemed to make a huge difference to the growth of the plant, since then we have consistently pruned our plant and it has flourished.
The first plant has never had a pruning and it continues to be a small plant without much growth.
Strange as it seems, this is so true of human flourishing when we are tested and tried – pruned in life we seem to flourish. Without it we seem to wither or often deteriorate. This is so counterintuitive because we want to play safe in life and also keep our loved ones from not being bruised or burnt in life.
May be we must reconsider.
It reminds me of a certain parable Jesus said about Him being the vine and we the branches. Only those that abide in the vine bear fruit and ones that bear fruit, He prunes that they may bear even more fruit. The ones that don’t bear fruit are cut off.
Pruning is hard on the gardener and I think on the plant too, but I guess it is needed for the plant for its own flourishing.
Therefore, would like to encourage if you are going through a tough phase in life, don’t get too discouraged there are days of flourishing that lie beyond the tough times.
Also, if we don’t take trials well or suffer well we must be careful. Trails and difficult help us refocus our lives and its priorities. It helps us come out stronger. It helps develop perseverance and grit if we respond well. If we don’t respond well we can become bitter and deteriorate very soon.
Also, if you are like a gardener in someone else’s life, do that which is needed for that person to grow with much care and gentleness. Let them know hard things, even if that mean pain and heartache for sometime. It would help them flourish later. I struggled with this when I was pruning the plant in my garden. It seemed so difficult but once I have seen the results and the good it does to the plant, I am willing to do it again with much care. Doing the same for people, doing it with care and consistency.
Letting other do that to you is also equally important, so that we grow and flourish.
Hope it was helpful even as you seek to flourish and help other do the same.